[{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"BlogPosting","@id":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/blog\/five-cars-wed-like-throw-bonfire\/#BlogPosting","mainEntityOfPage":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/blog\/five-cars-wed-like-throw-bonfire\/","headline":"5 cars we\u2019d like to throw on a bonfire","name":"5 cars we\u2019d like to throw on a bonfire","description":"The start of November is a time of the year when masses of people gather to burn things and release airborne explosives into the night sky. Bonfires are usually fueled by old bits of wood and bank statements, but we\u2019d rather see these cruddy cars frazzle to dust this November 5th instead. Disclaimer: before we start, perhaps it\u2019s best to clarify that we\u2019re not actively encouraging you to torch these apparently inadequate automobiles. Some people actually like them. This is […]","datePublished":"2016-11-01","dateModified":"2017-01-26","author":{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/author\/matthew-collett\/#Person","name":"Matthew Collett","url":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/author\/matthew-collett\/","identifier":5,"description":"Max Wheeler is a leading motoring journalist and classic car specialist at Smart Motoring, renowned for his sharp insight and infectious passion for all things automotive. With years of experience covering motoring news, supercars, and the enduring legacy of classic cars, Max brings stories to life with style and authority. Whether it\u2019s the roar of a Lamborghini, the elegance of an Aston Martin DB5, or the cultural impact of vintage motoring icons, he delivers expert commentary that inspires enthusiasts and collectors alike. Dedicated to celebrating the heritage and future of driving, Max Wheeler is your trusted voice for classic car news and beyond.","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/64eca1152247aa111ace79ff1c03782b175df9dc21d2092364ff21e1cf5e38fa?s=96&d=mm&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/64eca1152247aa111ace79ff1c03782b175df9dc21d2092364ff21e1cf5e38fa?s=96&d=mm&r=g","height":96,"width":96}},"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Smart Motoring","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/smart-motoring_news_logo_g-e1765846726493.webp","url":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/smart-motoring_news_logo_g-e1765846726493.webp","width":600,"height":60}},"image":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/feature-1.jpg","url":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/feature-1.jpg","height":520,"width":1200},"url":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/blog\/five-cars-wed-like-throw-bonfire\/","about":["BLOG"],"wordCount":481,"keywords":["Bonfire Night","Chrysler PT Cruiser","Fiat Multipla","Mitsubishi Mirage","Suzuki Wagon R+","VW Golf","VW Polo"],"articleBody":"The start of November is a time of the year when masses of people gather to burn things and release airborne explosives into the night sky.Bonfires are usually fueled by old bits of wood and bank statements, but we\u2019d rather see these cruddy cars frazzle to dust this November 5th instead.Disclaimer: before we start, perhaps it\u2019s best to clarify that we\u2019re not actively encouraging you to torch these apparently inadequate automobiles. Some people actually like them. This is just a bit of fun. Don\u2019t be illegal.Fiat MultiplaAlmost 20 years have gone by and and we still don\u2019t know what\u2019s going on with that front-end. Fiat\u2019s awkward compact MPV won the title of Top Gear\u2019s ugliest car in 1999 while the Telegraph likened it to \u2018a psychotic cartoon duck\u2019.They say what really matters is what\u2019s under the skin and inside, the Multipla was fantastically practical with a clever seating arrangement. It had two rows of three seats (how many six-seaters can you name?) and the middle seat could be folded flat to double-up as a table.Still, there is no forgiving its hideousness, so onto the fiery mound it must go!Any VW Harlequin Polo or GolfSay hi to the automotive equivalent of Frankenstein\u2019s monster.These Harlequin models were created by swapping the body panels of four different coloured models. Thankfully, there aren\u2019t many knocking about because only a few hundred of these special edition models were made for the Polo and Golf ranges.Suzuki Wagon R+There\u2019s a reason why cars tend to be wider than they are taller: corners. Consequently, the Wagon R+ looks as if it would tip over if it hit a mini roundabout at the right speed and angle.Is it a supermini? Is it an MPV? It\u2019s both and neither. It\u2019s hilarious yet tragic because it\u2019s rubbish at being both those things and therefore must be put on the bonfire!Mitsubishi MirageA car so comprehensively rubbish that it attracts ridicule like flies to week-old Shredded Wheat.Top Gear magazine slammed it as \u201ctruly, profoundly terrible\u201d, while The Guardian likened the handling to that of \u201ca bloody jellyfish\u201d.It has the driving dynamics of a wooden horse, a naff interior, a noisy and harsh ride, yet Mitsubishi still has the cheek to ask in excess of \u00a311,000 for the privilege? No thanks. Into the flames you go…Chrysler PT CruiserWe gave the PT Cruiser a ravaging in our Halloween cars feature last week and it\u2019s going to get another ribbing here.The exterior is the unfortunate outcome of what happens when car designers try to reimagine what many consider to be a classic getaway car used by the old American gangsters. The end result was a tacky unsightly mess that broke down a lot. Bonfire fodder."},{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Blog","item":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/blog\/#breadcrumbitem"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"5 cars we\u2019d like to throw on a bonfire","item":"https:\/\/smart-motoring.com\/blog\/five-cars-wed-like-throw-bonfire\/#breadcrumbitem"}]}]